Chocolate chip cookies are amazing! Most people love them,
but there are many different kinds. Recipes vary from using semi-sweet to milk
chocolate, from using butter or shortening the amounts of the ingredients may
change a bit, but the recipe is at its core the same. Just as good cookies come
from a good recipe, good marriages follow a recipe. Each marriage is different,
and thus the recipe might have to vary, but the same core ingredients are
present in a good marriage.
The first ingredient of a good marriage is the idea that it
is meant to last forever. Marriage is essential to our Heavenly Father’s plan, In
The Family: A Proclamation to the World, we are taught “The first commandment
that God gave to Adam and Eve pertained to their potential for parenthood as
husband and wife.” We also learn in that document, “His children could obtain a
physical body and gain earthly experience to progress toward perfection and
ultimately realize their divine destiny as heirs of eternal life. The divine
plan of happiness enables family relationships to be perpetuated beyond the
grave.” Both of these statements help one to understand the important and
eternal nature of marriage and family.
Unfortunately, our society seems to view marriage as a
simple contract that is easily broken. Elder Dallin H. Oak of The Church of
Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints addresses this topic in this short video.
When I was 12 years old my parents who had been married for
13 years divorce. The divorce was difficult for me to process. I had no idea
that my parents did not get along. So, the idea that divorce was a part of my
life really bothered me. Everything in my life changed! I only saw my father
every other weekend, we had to sell our house and move to an apartment, and I
often felt like if I did something better this would not have happened.
As I
have grown to adulthood, some of the problems of my parents’ divorce linger. I
still feel like I have to divide my time equally between them. Holidays become
a huge problem as my husband and I try to be with his family and then my
family. It does not help much that my parents after 28 years still strongly
dislike each other.
What did experiencing a divorce do to me? It made me
determined to not continue the pattern of divorce in my life and my children’s
life. I have been married now for 25 years. No we are not a perfect couple.
Yes, we struggle and disagree. However, we work hard every day to our marriage
one that will last through eternity. I remember that in my marriage recipe that
forever is a key ingredient. So, when times get tough or things look bleak, I
look to the Savior. My husband and I pray for understanding. We pray for forgiveness.
We repent of our wrongs, and then we look forward together.
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