While there are not many ingredients that one would consider
healthy in cookie, there are many ingredients that are healthy in a marriage.
One of the most powerful ingredients is that of intimacy. Physical intimacy is
ordained of God as outlined in The Family: A Proclamation to the World, “We
declare that God’s commandment for His children to multiply and replenish the
earth remains in force. We further declare that God has commanded that the
sacred powers of procreation are to be employed only between man and woman,
lawfully wedded as husband and wife.” It further declares, “Children are
entitled to birth within the bonds of matrimony, and to be reared by a father
and a mother who honor marital vows with complete fidelity.” Proclamation
What is fidelity? Many would say fidelity means you will not
have physically intimate relationships with anyone outside your marriage. While
this is a true answer, there is more to fidelity than just refraining from
sexual relations outside of your marriage. Emotional infidelity is as harmful
to the marriage relationship as physical infidelity. In Doctrine and Covenants
42:22 we read, “Thou shalt love thy wife with all thy heart, and shalt cleave
unto her and none else.” This means any other person or anything that steals
your heart from your spouse. Spencer W. Kimball taught, “The words none else eliminate everyone and everything. The spouse
then becomes preeminent in the life of the husband or wife, and neither social
life nor occupational life nor political life nor any other interest nor person
nor thing shall ever take precedence over the companion spouse.”
Dr. H. Wallace Goddard gives some signs to look for in our
own relationships. He calls them the stages of unfaithfulness:
1.
The relationship is declared as special
2.
Worry about what others will say about the time
or affection shared with another person
3.
Making excuses or lying about time spent with
other person
4.
Comparing spouse to “special friend”
5.
Fantasizing about being with the other person
6.
Rationalizing that the relationship is not a
problem
7.
Showing of any physical affection
Dr. Goddard also gives things we can do to prevent
unfaithfulness:
1.
Do not allow the seeds of lust to germinate
2.
Never make excuses to spend time alone with
someone of the opposite sex
3.
Take responsibility for the messages you send
4.
Do not allow your heart to dwell on anyone
5.
If you find yourself making excuses for
continuing a relationship seek help
6.
Spend more enjoyable time with your spouse
7.
Renew your spiritual efforts
8.
Don’t allow yourself to spend time alone with
another person
9.
Never view pornography
10.
Celebrate the gift of companionship with your
spouse
If we follow these guidelines we can keep our marriages safe
from infidelity. As Dr. Goddard said, “Fidelity may seem to be confining. It
always will—unless we adopt God’s perspective.” As we involve god in our
marriage relationship we add the spiritual ingredient necessary to help our
marriages to flourish.
This video gives us another way to look at infidelity
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